Part 756: BattleMech Piloting 101

Battlemech Piloting 101 (Part 1 of probably 1)



Battlemechs are awesome, this is a proven fact. Giant robots fighting other giant robots is awesome; but a 'Mech is only as good as its pilot, which is why today I'm giving you all a crash course in ‘mech piloting!

So, how does one pilot a battlemech? Well, to drive, you have to first understand how a 'Mechwarrior sees the world. To do that, you have to understand the Neurohelmet.

I won't go too deeply into what the Neurohelmet does, but basically it translates the brain's signals to and from the inner ear, and uses those to keep a 'Mech's gyro in phase. Or, in even simpler terms: No neurohelmet, no balance. A 'Mech can be operated without a Neurohelmet, but only basic moves are possible and it cannot walk without falling over.

The Neurohelmet is also the biggest cause of injuries for pilots: ammo explosions, falls, and other things all cause feedback which disrupts higher brain functions and can cause a pilot to black out.

The other reason the Neurohelmet causes so many injuries?


Bitch be heavy, yo! An Inner Sphere Neurohelmet weighs approximately 50 lbs.

So, as you can see, the Neurohelmet does not leave a lot of room for, oh… head movement. In fact, it locks the head in place to keep the pilot from breaking connections to the sensors which read his balance. This is good—the helmet will protect his neck from whiplash, but also bad (see above: it’s heavy). Piloting a Battlemech is uncomfortable, piloting one for eight-twelve hours is torture.

So, with that in mind, most ‘Mech cockpits don’t provide a lot of visibility. Sure, most of them give a pretty good forward view, but it’s rare to see side windows—the ‘Mechwarrior can’t use them, so a big, high-visibility cockpit just makes for a bigger target.

In addition to the Neurohelmet, every ‘Mechwarrior also wears a coolant vest, which circulates ‘mech coolant over the ‘Mechwarrior’s torso. Most burn-related injuries occur to the arms and legs, and several ‘Mechwarriors have had their skin melt into their cockpit seats due to overheating. The Coolant Vest will keep a ‘Mechwarrior alive, but only if it’s intact. It’s lightly armored, but if pierced by shrapnel?

Well, ‘Mech coolant is poisonous. It’s also a very sickly shade of pink that makes it very hard to tell if it’s saturated a wound.



Now, knowing that a ‘Mechwarrior needs to be able to see behind and to the sides without turning his head, what does a ‘Mech’s cockpit look like?

If you guessed something like this:

You’d be wrong. A ‘Mechwarrior—unable to turn his head and unable to see any direction but straight forward is eating an AC/20 to the back before he realizes he’s even dead. Fortunately, the good folks who first designed the venerable Mackie realized this was a horrible, horrible drawback.



A real ‘Mech cockpit looks like this:

A central viewport, with a panoramic vision strip—a full 360 degree view compressed into a 60 degree field of vision below it. That should give a ‘Mechwarrior plenty of warning if something oh, the size of a Battlemech sneaks up on him. Unfortunately, it makes spotting smaller targets—like infantry—far more difficult.

So, that big forward view must make targeting a breeze too, right?

WRONG!

All targeting is done on the panoramic vision strip.


Even better?

Yes, two crosshairs. You have two arms, and they can be targeted separately. For ease of use, most ‘Mechwarriors ignore this functionality and simply have their computer combine the crosshairs into a single one. This lets them effectively control the ‘Mech with a single joystick, rather than needing to have both hands on two separate joysticks at the same time. This leaves them free to push buttons, turn knobs, and otherwise do all those little things any pilot of any vehicle ever needs to do to keep his vehicle running properly.

So, when a pilot moves his joystick, does he get one-to-one movement? Nope. He doesn’t get any movement unless he’s locked on to a target; or engaged his ‘Mech in a turn (by moving both crosshairs out of the ‘forward’ arc). When he’s finally locked onto a target (like that wonderfully flammable forest), a gold dot will blink in the center of his crosshairs and his ‘Mech’s computer will make the adjustments necessary to bring his weapons in-line with the target. This is why firing at multiple targets simultaneously is so difficult—the computer has a hard time deciding which should be the ‘primary’ target and will simply default to the target of the first weapon fired.

So, in short, the ‘Mechwarrior does not have any real precision control over his machine. Some ‘Mechwarriors can do amazing things, but only when you take a ‘Mech’s limitations into consideration. Controlling a battlemech is extremely difficult, and requires a lot of training—each individual ‘Mech is different. Piloting an unfamiliar ‘Mech, while not impossible, is extremely difficult.



Oh, and because I’m sure this will irritate you? This is what the Clanners are wearing.

Clan Neurohelmets weigh about six pounds, and they have full range of motion (which is why many Clan cockpits even come with, gasp, some peripheral vision!

Why, some of Clanners even choose to wear old-fashioned cooling vests when fighting Inner Sphere opponents just to give themselves an extra challenge that they wouldn’t get while wearing a full-body cooling suit (capable of keeping the entire body a comfortable 60 degrees no matter how hot the ‘Mech is running)!

Oh, and just to kick the dog a little more? Clan coolant is green and non-toxic. I hear it also tastes just like liquid lime jello.



The things I do when I'm too tired to update.